Chapter 2

“Will you… go out with me?!”

Those words came from Ahyeon’s lips.

The first emotions I felt upon hearing them were surprise and bewilderment.

I felt dazed, and a doubt crept in whether I had even heard her correctly.

But that was just a one-dimensional reaction.

Then, immediately after…

A massive emotional upheaval swept over me at lightning speed, not even giving me a moment to think of anything else.

Yeah, because it was the words I had wanted to hear most.

It was the moment I had imagined and wished for alone, countless times.

It was the feeling I had been suppressing for years.

And as if rewarding my long, long endurance, she had finally pulled out that festering heart of mine.

As that dreamlike situation unfolded right before my eyes, my thought process seemed to short-circuit for a moment…

My rational judgment was overrun in an instant.

“Okay. Let’s go out…”

Because of that, those words flew out of my mouth right away.

They came out in a rush, without considering the context at all.

Like someone driven by the fear that Ahyeon might take it back.

Yeah, because it was the moment I had wanted most in my entire life.

Because the feelings I had worked so hard to kill could finally come out now.

“Um…”

Ahyeon’s breathing trembled, slightly unstable.

I thought maybe… her unsteady breathing was because my reaction to her confession wasn’t overly enthusiastic, so I tried to add more.

Honestly… I was a bit flustered myself, so it was true that I couldn’t react with intense emotion right away.

“Sorry, I lacked the courage… so I made you say it first. Honestly, I’ve liked you so much…”

Unfortunately… my words didn’t manage to form a complete sentence.

“W-wait a second!!”

Ahyeon cut me off urgently.

With a voice and face full of panic, she thrust her hand forward as if telling me to stop talking.

Startled by that, I was forced to swallow my words.

“Why are you suddenly like that…?”

Ahyeon said that, her gaze fixed firmly on the classroom floor.

She was asking why I was suddenly acting like that.

As if my reaction had made things even more awkward for her.

What could her reaction at this moment possibly mean?

I ponder it deeply.

But… even without thinking deeply, I already knew what that action meant.

I was just willfully turning a blind eye, insisting it wasn’t said with that meaning.

That this wasn’t one of those miserable moments.

That this moment had to be the fantastical one where my long-held crush, my long-held dream, was coming true.

Like that… deceiving myself, comforting myself, soothing myself.

Gasping for breath against the stark contrast of emotions, barely swallowing it down.

“Huh…? What…? You’re the one who…”

By the time I asked that in return, my rationality finally forced the cold reality into my eyes.

Ahyeon’s friends were watching from the front door of the classroom with shocked expressions.

One was giggling, another was recording the scene on her phone.

Before I knew it, the other kids in the classroom were also watching us, as if to gawk.

Those sights were truly frightening and terrifying.

I couldn’t breathe. The breath I was drawing in caught in my throat, tormenting me, neither able to swallow nor spit it out.

For a moment, I felt like a panic attack I’d never experienced before was about to hit.

“Sorry… it was a joke. I didn’t think you’d react like that… Anyway, sorry.”

Without even meeting my eyes, Ahyeon left those words and then hurriedly rushed out of the classroom.

Her appearance was utterly unfamiliar.

It felt like she wasn’t the Choi Ahyeon I knew, or maybe she had just become unfamiliar in that moment.

The face of Ahyeon reflected in my eyes looked pitch black, as if a shadow had been cast over it.

.

.

.

I was dumbfounded.

I couldn’t make heads or tails of anything.

Actually, the more accurate expression would be that I didn’t want to make heads or tails of it.

Yeah, because I was afraid to understand.

“Whoa, shit…. This is a Legend-level situation.”

But there were too many people who witnessed this situation.

Because of that, I’m being force-fed this gruesome reality.

Even though I’m desperately trying to turn away, it’s brutally persistent.

“You okay? You should… just say it was a joke too. That’s the only way.”

“……”

Junyong offered that solution from the seat behind me.

Jeez.

In a situation like this, he’s pushing up his glasses and coolly offering solutions.

Ah, of course, he doesn’t actually wear glasses.

Then, the clamor around me began to seep into my ears.

As if each sound was deliberately informing me of my pathetic state, one by one.

“Whoa… no way, that was a total GOAT move.”

“What’s Gu Jinho gonna do now?”

“I feel bad for him, but it’s kind of… funny. Pfft.”

“‘I lacked the courage… blah blah…’ That’s a legendary line, for sure.”

“But why would Choi Ahyeon even like him in the first place…? It’s obvious from the start that it was just a dare.”

Yeah, just like that, I was getting thoroughly humiliated.

Because of that, my current situation felt utterly scathing.

How stupid I had become.

Well, like you guys pointed out… I should have realized it was a joke.

I should have sensed that something was off from the start.

Looking back now… there was no way I couldn’t have known.

It was weird that she suddenly confessed today. And in a classroom full of people during lunch, no less.

And I, more than anyone, should have known that there was never any indication Ahyeon liked me.

Why did I react so eagerly to her words?

I didn’t just simply say “okay” to her asking me out—I had to go and make a fuss with all those extra lines.

…….

Of course. Because I was that sincere.

I had been waiting for and imagining this moment alone, so many times… Of course, I had no choice but to react that way.

My heart was just honest and true.

But that sincerity of mine… shockingly, was mocked and ridiculed, publicly humiliated, and made into a laughingstock.

That feeling I had secretly killed for so long, finally mustering the courage to let it out into the world.

Was cruelly trampled and buried again.

As if it were some taboo, as if my feelings for Choi Ahyeon were a sin, not just an overstep.

As if I were being chastised for merely having had those thoughts at all.

“I… I’m gonna go to the bathroom for a sec.”

I said that to Junyong in a low voice and left the classroom.

I just couldn’t stay there anymore.

I already felt like I was going crazy.

Like I couldn’t even keep my eyes focused from the shock.

Even while I was sitting there perfectly fine, the whispering noise kept grating on my nerves.

It felt like they were testing to see when I would finally snap.

Eventually, I lost my composure under the pressure and fled to the bathroom, where I ran my hands under the sink, staring blankly into the mirror.

Whether thanks to the cold tap water on my hands, I felt myself cooling down.

And as I cooled down, I felt myself losing my vitality more and more.

“Hey! I heard there was a total disaster in Class C earlier when someone confessed as a joke?!”

“Who? Seriously?”

“Choi Ahyeon from Class A and Gu Jinho from Class C!!”

“For real? Let’s go, let’s go!!”

The hallway outside the bathroom was still buzzing about what had just happened.

Well, of course it was. From their perspective, it was a big deal.

At this age, there’s no better entertainment than something this funny.

Yeah, literally, she confessed as a joke because of a dare… and I, knowing nothing, answered with complete sincerity.

And then I got rejected, becoming a pathetic joke.

.

.

.

This is seriously the worst….

***

After that, none of the classes registered in my brain at all.

I couldn’t even process what was being said.

I was just dazed. I was staring at something with hollow eyes, not even conscious of looking, just keeping them open.

Even with my eyes open, the earlier scene kept playing out in my head. And it was vivid as hell.

Ahyeon’s flustered expression. The mocking laughter of the kids behind her.

Then, the whispers of people I didn’t even know the names or faces of.

It was still so vivid, digging into my heart and tormenting me.

It wouldn’t let me go easily.

And… the final blow.

“Hey… did you see Insta?”

“See what?”

“Never mind. Don’t look. Just stay off SNS for a while.”

Junyong said that, looking at me with pity.

But when someone says that… it just makes you want to check anyway, human nature and all.

Honestly, I had a rough idea of what had happened.

“Let me see. What is it?”

Junyong, with a hesitant look, finally logged onto Insta on his phone and showed me a video.

It looks like a Story…

And the account… I’ve never seen it before, so it’s probably one of Ahyeon’s friends.

[Just witnessed an epic cringe disaster lol]

That caption was written, and then it played a clip of me eagerly accepting the confession.

It didn’t show Ahyeon confessing, just me accepting it eagerly and then getting rejected.

And that Story video already had a bunch of comments on it.

[Guess he got hooked right away ’cause she’s an actress lol]
[GOAT acting skills]
[But wait, did he seriously think Choi Ahyeon liked him?]
[Legend LEGEND]
[lolololololololol]
[This is too harsh to screenshot like that. Well, I saw it, so take it down now]

I quietly looked away from Junyong’s phone.

“Shit…”

And then, that curse slipped out of my mouth unconsciously.

If I hadn’t, I felt like the disgust I had just seen and felt would fester inside me.

“I… told you not to look?”

“Yeah.”

That’s all I could say.

Yeah, I guess I had to go and open Pandora’s Box myself.

What could I even say to him?

But… honestly, I felt like I had crumbled a bit from that.

My mental state was severely shaken.

Seeing myself publicly paraded around and made into a laughingstock like that.

My heart was pounding, and cold sweat instantly trickled down my temples.

My chest felt tight, and then I even started feeling nauseous.

And with my mental state shaken like that… my thoughts naturally spiraled into the dark.

What did she even think of me to do something like this?

What was she really thinking?

What is she thinking right now, watching that video… reading those comments?

Does she think it’s funny, just like them? Or is she embarrassed too?

Is she thinking it’s my fault for accepting, that it’s my mistake?

Yeah, and she still hasn’t given me any explanation or apology.

If you’re going to toy with someone like that… shouldn’t an apology come first?

Do you have any idea how I felt, killing those feelings all this time?

And when I finally could let them out, thinking you felt the same way… do you know how happy I was?

Do you know how happy I was to think I could finally be someone who could tell you I liked you?

It’s not even just that I got rejected… I feel like I’m going to lose my mind over the fact that I became your little entertainment.

How could you…?

.

.

.

I don’t think… I can be around you like before anymore.