-So just give me some food as an offering.
-Then I’ll make you my real priest.
The hand grilling the marinated short ribs stopped.
It was hard not to get lost in thought.
Naturally, the direction was positive.
‘Tempting.’
The deliberation was short.
The problem of impersonating a priest had been a lingering concern ever since I fell into this place.
There was no reason to refuse when a few meals could resolve it.
“Then shall we start with the contract? Are you able to sign the contract?”
-Huh?
“You don’t know what a contract is?”
-Uh… I know, but isn’t the relationship between a god and a priest usually not the kind of cold, formal thing where you sign paperwork?
“It seems you don’t have much experience, so you might not know, but making promises without a contract is a surefire way to get burned.”
-I’m still 1,400 years old, you know…?
The goddess sounded utterly dumbfounded.
“So can you sign or stamp?”
-No…
“Then we have no choice. Since there’s no recorder, we’ll do this as a verbal contract.”
-Uh…
It wasn’t a very satisfactory answer, but at least I got her consent.
-But I’m not a demon, is it really necessary to make a contract?
“Why not?”
I gently reasoned with the goddess, who still seemed uncertain, and organized the terms of the agreement.
The first party shall be Iris, the Goddess of Flowers.
The second party shall be Flawira, priest of the Goddess of Flowers.
The second party shall offer three meals a day as offerings to the first party.
The value of the offering shall be based on what the second party normally eats, at least half a Copper Coin per meal.
If circumstances are difficult, the offering may be postponed.
Instead, the cost of the next offering shall increase by the number of postponed meals.
In return, the first party promises the second party the status of a formal priest.
I recited the contract terms organized in my head once more, then nodded.
“Not bad.”
-Half a Copper Coin seems too little…
“It’s not like I’m buying food; I’m making it myself, so it’s more than enough.”
-Hmph.
I heard a dissatisfied voice, but I cut it off firmly.
“If you’re a goddess, speak with some maturity.”
-I am saying hmph.
“?”
As I finished sorting out the contract, I finally brought up the important part.
“Now then, give me the payment you promised.”
-Huh?
“Didn’t you say you’d make me a real priest?”
-Hehe..
But what came back wasn’t an answer, just a loose laugh.
Something about the ominous reaction made me furrow my brow.
And the answer that followed was something I could never have imagined.
-Actually, you’re already my priest.
“..?”
-When you were pretending to be my priest, I took the chance and claimed you! Didn’t you notice how you smelled like flowers whenever you used your power? I was so frustrated that you never caught on!
It was an utterly absurd answer.
“..May I ask since when?”
-Umm, the day after you got here?
“…”
I couldn’t find words for a while, standing there holding the spatula.
And before long, I processed the situation.
‘I’ve been had.’
It seemed I’d fallen for a scam contract.
I’d let my guard down because of that childish voice.
-Saying it like that makes me sound like an evil god..
The goddess grumbled as if she’d read my mind, but I didn’t hear her.
I only came to my senses after taking a deep breath to calm down.
“But why tell me only now?”
I asked, slightly irritated and blunt.
The thought that I wouldn’t have agonized at all if I’d known earlier kept bitter words on my tongue.
But her next answer left me with no choice but to shut my mouth.
-Well, it’s because you never prayed to me.
“…”
-I wanted to talk to you the whole time, you know. The only reason I could talk to you today was because I barely managed to reach you through my statue.
So it was ultimately my fault.
Looking back, I had no room to argue.
‘This is what they call reaping what you sow.’
A wave of emptiness washed over me.
Just then, the goddess, growing impatient, spoke up.
-Hey, isn’t the meat about done?
“…”
At her words, I lowered my gaze.
True enough, I’d been so busy organizing the contract terms that I’d neglected it.
Sure enough, when I opened the lid, a puff of hot steam and the sweet scent of meat burst out.
Fortunately, it was overcooked more than I’d wanted, but not to a serious degree.
‘That was close; I almost burned it.’
I picked up a piece of the short rib and moved it to a plate.
-Hurry up and give it to me! Hurry!
I sighed at how she was rushing like a little kid.
“How do I give it to you?”
I obviously had no experience offering things to a god.
The Gallery had never described how to make offerings either, so my knowledge was completely empty.
‘Maybe I just burn it.’
I vaguely recalled Greek myths about burning offerings in fire, but I couldn’t be sure if that was right.
In the end, I waited for the goddess to answer, but what came back was far from what I expected.
-Nom nom..
I could hear the sound of eating.
Wondering if she’d taken it in that moment, I looked at the plate, but the food on it was remarkably untouched.
-It was delicious! Please do it again next time!
‘..I don’t get it, but I guess it counts as an offering if I intend it to be one.’
I let out a sigh of relief.
‘Then I don’t need to prepare any extra food.’
That was a relief.
-Then I’ll count on you tomorrow too!
With that, the goddess’s presence faded, her voice full of satisfaction.
The flower scent that had filled the air also gradually thinned.
“Phew..”
‘I’m already exhausted.’
It felt like dealing with a superior’s young daughter who was impossibly above me in rank.
I shook my head and gathered the food.
They’d probably be waiting by now.
Sure enough, Malza the priest was already sitting at the table, waiting quietly.
“I smell something delicious!”
Her eyes sparkled the moment the food arrived.
“Have you been waiting long?”
“A little?”
She said that, but her gaze never left the short ribs.
‘She must be starving.’
I quickly moved the plate in front of Malza the priest.
Her expectant expression suddenly shifted to one of puzzlement. She had noticed my plate, set down right after.
“Oh, but Priest Flawi, aren’t you eating the meat? If it’s not enough, we can share!”
‘Seems like I keep saying the same thing today.’
In Malza the priest’s case, she was asking out of pure curiosity, but honestly, I found it annoying.
“..I just don’t eat meat. My digestion has gotten weaker, so it doesn’t sit well with me.”
Fortunately, she didn’t pry deeper.
“My grandmother used to say that all the time too. She said once you get old, it makes you bloated so you can’t eat it, so eat a lot while you’re young.”
“That’s the best advice I’ve ever heard.”
“Hehe.“
To shut up the noisy Malza the priest, I folded my hands together.
Seeing that, Malza the priest hurriedly closed her eyes and folded her hands too.
It was the prayer before the meal.
Of course, mine was just going through the motions.
“..Thank you for granting us the nourishment to bloom and take root again today.”
-Yeah! Enjoy your meal!
“Cough.“
Even though it was just a show, the reply startled me into coughing.
The Malza priest across from me hadn’t heard anything, her eyes still closed with a devout expression.
‘So only I can hear her.’
The theory that it might be auditory hallucinations resurfaced, even if just a little.
“..Let’s eat.”
“Yes!”
As if she’d been waiting, Malza the priest took a big bite of the short rib.
“This is! So good!”
“I’m glad it suits your taste.”
“It’s really delicious!”
Judging by how she emphasized it twice, it didn’t seem like empty flattery.
“If you need more, just say so.”
“Yes!”
I guess it’s because I’m Korean. I couldn’t help feeling pleased seeing a kid eat so well.
“Then I’ll do the dishes!”
Right after finishing her meal, without even waiting for a reply, Malza the priest took the empty plates and walked off. I watched her retreating figure with a wry smile.
‘Well, I can trust her with the dishes at least.’
It wasn’t cooking, so I returned to my personal room with peace of mind.
And following my usual routine, I opened the Gallery.
‘Might as well do some studying.’
Just as I was about to start studying religion, something I’d never imagined myself doing, a title caught my eye among the posts that were coming in faster than usual.
Title: Breaking News! Sun Church Saintess’s Pilgrimage Route Announced
Author: Sola Victory
[Photo]
[Photo]
[Photo]
That’s all for the announced route of the Saintess
All you isekai bros living in those cities, get your flower petals ready to scatter when the Saintess passes by
‘She gets around quite a bit.’
True to the name “pilgrimage,” she seemed to be passing through multiple cities.
The comment section was just as charged.
[Is the Saintess pretty?]
ã„´[She’s the continent’s most supreme beautiful girl]
ã„´[Super pretty]
ã„´[She’s my wife candidate]
ã„´[If the Inquisitor comes for you, just accept your fate..]
Up to this point, the reactions were normal.
The problem was below that.
[Those cities are so screwed]
ã„´[Isn’t the Saintess coming a good thing?]
My scrolling finger stopped.
ã„´[Would you be happy if a Division Commander visited? It’d suck, right]
ã„´[Ah..]
ã„´[For real, they’re screwed]
After reading the comments, I scrolled back up a bit.
I checked the pilgrimage route again.
And one familiar name caught my eye.
Millers.
None other than the city I’d settled in.
“…”
‘This is going to be a pain.’
But that was the extent of my reaction.
She was a Saintess, sure, but she was a Saintess of a neighboring religion, not mine.
However, it didn’t take long for me to realize how complacent that thinking was.
..Really not long at all.
Bang bang bang-!
Urgent knocking echoed through the room.
“Priest! Priest!”
“…”
At the familiar voice, I opened the door, and the Lord was standing outside.
Gone was his usual relaxed demeanor.
He was panting so hard from running that sweat had gathered on his forehead.
And the moment the door opened, he latched onto me like an inexperienced protagonist running to a blue raccoon robot for help.
“Wahh, we’re in big trouble! The Sun Church Saintess! The Saintess is coming!”