“As long as it’s not me!!!”
“Eek—!!! Oh my god, I thought I was caught?!”
“That was way too close, for real… whew—!”
The friends I made after entering high school and started hanging out with.
Unlike me, who graduated from an ordinary middle school in the provinces, some of them had their talents spotted from a young age, others had been under strict management, and some had already dipped their toes into the industry.
Some even created talents out of nothing.
Most came from good families, and the friends by my side now even had solid backing behind them.
Unlike me, this was that kind of school.
In the first place… I had nurtured this dream late, so my start was later than everyone else’s.
And I knew that too. If I was going to walk this path, I’d have to push through one step harder—that was the place I chose with that awareness.
“Ahyeon got picked! Since you’re an aspiring actress… try doing a confession scene. How about it?”
“Agreed, agreed! I heard you’re applying for the web drama audition too… I’m curious!”
“Wow, but I have a lot of friends who want to be actors too… Honestly, those kids are different.”
“Really? Introduce me to some too.”
“Sure!”
“For real? Let’s hang out next time. How about it?”
“Then, Ahyeon too… Ahyeon, let’s hang out together. It’s good to get close with people in the same industry, right? Yeah?!”
It felt good.
Just being with these friends made me feel like I’d broken out of a small, stagnant well.
In the casual everyday moments, the conversations.
There were so many new things I could never have encountered at an ordinary middle school.
So… sharing these moments side by side, I felt a kind of belonging.
I had nothing to my name, yet I was hanging out with them on my face and talent alone.
For someone like me walking a path that didn’t fit my circumstances, meeting these friends meant that.
I thought that if I got along well with them, I’d gain a lot.
“Phew— I actually got picked?! I’m going crazy.”
I put on a troubled expression, but let out a light laugh as naturally as breathing.
“If you’re going to do it anyway, why not try it on that trainee from the dance department?! He’s seriously gorgeous?!”
“Right?! And who knows, it might work out… we could become the school’s first official couple.”
“Ooh— that’s so exciting.”
“Ahyeon’s super pretty too. A total perfect couple?”
It’s my penalty, but… the people around me are making such a fuss.
If you’re that into it, why don’t you do it yourselves.
Honestly… whatever.
Even as I thought that in my head… my feelings were genuinely complicated.
Yeah, I do have to do the confession as a penalty… but how am I supposed to pick the target?
Like what the kids in front of me were saying, what if they actually accept it and the situation gets even more awkward?
It’d be way better to just get rejected and end it in embarrassment.
Or if I suddenly did that to some guy I don’t know, things could blow up.
And those guys are just watching from the sidelines, all carefree like “if it works out, great”—they can talk like it’s some web novel, but…
Bottom line, this isn’t even the time for me to think about dating. I shouldn’t be doing it at all.
Ugh… why did I have to get picked of all people?!
…
Jino…
Would Jino be okay?
He knows my situation… and we’re really close too.
If I explain it to him later, he’d understand. He’s always considered my situation first.
And with Jino, it wouldn’t be that embarrassing… and I could get through this penalty super easily.
The others don’t know how close I am with Jino anyway, so they wouldn’t think I cheated the penalty.
And more than anything, there’s no way Jino would accept my confession, so there’s no risk of that awkward disaster.
He’s not some stranger either, so I wouldn’t be that scared.
…He’s literally the perfect target.
“I’ll go do it. I get to pick, right?!”
With that, I push myself up from my seat.
“No way, no way!!”
“Honestly, I love that Ahyeon doesn’t drag things out.”
“For real. She’s so straightforward, hanging out with her is a blast.”
“So who? What class? Or is it a senior? Eek—!”
In my head, I’d already mapped out the perfect scenario.
Yeah, in the scenario I ran through my head, there wasn’t a single flaw.
There wasn’t…
.
.
.
“Okay. Let’s date….”
Hearing those words, my brain seemed to stop working for a moment.
Because it didn’t match the scenario I’d expected?
Because my plan fell apart?
Because he accepted a confession made as a joke?
No… that wasn’t it.
It was the fact that Gu Jinho had accepted my confession… that I was so shocked my brain temporarily lost function.
A joke confession, accepted by none other than Gu Jinho.
Simply put, I was in shock. A shock born from an emotion I couldn’t properly put into words.
If I tried to trace that feeling, it felt like it had bloomed from a side of someone so close to me that I’d never seen before.
Like I’d seen a side of him I didn’t know.
Jino.
The Jino who was always by my side, so close, every single moment.
The Jino who never seemed to see me as a girl at all.
But… how could he accept my confession…?
Does that mean he was actually seeing me as a girl this whole time?
Because of that, whatever he said afterward… didn’t even register in my ears properly.
All I could think was—
I need to end this situation, fast.
Yeah, I need to explain that it was just a little incident from the penalty. That it was a joke. That was all I could think about.
***
My feelings were strange too.
Knowing that Jinho saw me as a girl, that he’d liked me all this time…
My heart felt restless and confused.
Yeah, Jinho feels a little awkward now. Foreign. Like a distance is forming.
I’d been so blunt with Jinho without knowing anything… but he was actually seeing me as a girl the whole time. Somehow, that feels a little weird.
After all the time we’ve spent together. After all the time we’ve spent side by side.
We were each other’s closest friend, opening our hearts, leaning on each other comfortably, dreaming together, supporting each other through hard times.
That’s what we were. That’s what we were to each other.
But suddenly you’re telling me you had those feelings… so I feel a little weird too.
I don’t even know what to do anymore…
Haah…
Still… still, it’s my fault for messing around. I should apologize.
Yeah, Jino was definitely flustered too. Maybe he already noticed it was a joke and did it on purpose.
Yeah, right.
That must be it. So… everything will be fine. Nothing happened between us.
I roughly gathered my tangled feelings and focused on the fact that I was the one who messed up first.
After school ended, I went to Jino’s class.
When I arrived, I could see his seat was already empty.
“Isn’t that the girl who was embarrassed earlier?”
“She here for round two?”
“She’s not actually trying to date him, is she?”
“What the hell…”
I could hear those whispers directed at me as I arrived at Jino’s class.
As expected, the fire from earlier was still smoldering with faint embers.
I ignored the chatter and headed toward the school gate.
I figured he couldn’t have gotten too far yet.
I walked at a slightly quicker pace.
At a street corner a little ways from school, I spotted Jino’s back.
I walked right up and called out to him.
I apologized first, then explained why I did it… the whole situation.
I believed that if I explained, Jino would understand. I mean, it was a joke.
And you know that if it wasn’t you, I wouldn’t have anyone else to pull that kind of prank on… you know that, Jino.
I believed that I could pull this off with you, that you’d understand, Jino.
And at the same time… I tried to think that Jino was joking too.
Yeah, I didn’t want this relationship, this bond… to be ruined like that.
I wanted us to stay like this—closer than anyone, knowing each other better than anyone, cheering each other on, always on each other’s side, always being each other’s strength.
…In the future, we’re supposed to work in the industry together. Succeed together on the dreams we built together.
We promised to look back at the past and celebrate with each other, saying how hard we worked.
So… let’s just let this slide like it’s nothing. I’m completely confused too, but I’m doing this because I want to protect this relationship.
“Yeah. I get it.”
That was Jino’s answer.
A plain response. Just as I’d hoped, Jino seemed… willing to let it go.
What a relief.
Relief…
Even as I felt relieved, something felt a little off.
Even though Jino had spoken in that casual, usual tone, the atmosphere was somehow different.
What is it…? What’s going on…
I couldn’t pinpoint it exactly, but there was a feeling that things had subtly gone cold.
That feeling made my heart tighten. I felt a little anxious too.
But… his words weren’t really any different from usual.
I guess… after something like that, he’s still not over it.
Yeah… I’d be the same. Just because you accept an apology doesn’t mean your mood clears up right away.
So I guess you could say he’s sulking.
Then I’ll just have to act a little sweeter and more affectionate by his side… and warm him back up.
***
But… it didn’t seem like it would thaw that easily.
I understood that much.
I thought it made sense. I knew this wasn’t something that would be resolved in a day or two.
And right now… the kids at school kept whispering about it like that.
When I told one group to stop, it would start up somewhere else.
That’s just how rumors spread. Like a wildfire.
Embers keep lingering somewhere, and just when it seems to die down, it spreads wider and wider.
Lately… forget his tone, even his actions had started changing.
There’s no way he’d forget to help me with script reading.
Along with his curt tone… actions that were different from usual.
I guess you could say the things he used to do naturally, he now does cautiously.
…Is he still that upset?
When is he going to get over it.
I keep trying to lighten the mood… acting like usual, no, even more warmly than usual.
But he suddenly told me he’d only help me until this audition…
I get that he’s that mad…
But I’m doing everything I can to fix this mess.
And when that video went up, I was in an awkward spot too, you know.
Haah—.
Maybe it’s all in my head. Am I being overly sensitive?
After everything that happened… maybe I’m just reading into things, watching Jino’s reactions when he’s not even thinking that way.
I don’t know.
What do I do. What should I do.
I just hope this all gets buried soon. Jino seems to be struggling because of it too.
Yeah, if that happens… everything will be resolved.
.
.
.
I was heading to lunch with those thoughts.
My friends were all buzzing about the performance evaluation announced today.
But seriously, prepping for the audition… and the performance evaluation on top of that. My plate’s pretty full too.
Speaking of which, the practical music department will have their performance evaluation too. What is Jino doing?
Is he okay…
With that worry, an image of Jino’s presence at school crossed my mind.
“It’s Gu Jinho…!”
“Heh heh.”
Huh…?
Jino?
Just as I was thinking about him, my friends suddenly started saying that.
I’ve told them before not to talk like that… but there they go again.
I was planning to seriously tell them to stop when Jino walked by. Like, he’s my really close friend… so quit teasing him like that.
And doing it in front of Jino probably isn’t something he’d appreciate either.
The Jino I know… is the type who wants these things to blow over as quietly as possible.
With that in mind, I thought about greeting him first, acting friendly.
If I acted that way, I felt like I could correct the teasing atmosphere around him.
I thought it would show that we’d already laughed it off between us.
But… in that moment.
I froze without meaning to. The words I was about to say wouldn’t come out.
The moment my friends whispered, the girl walking alongside Jino suddenly shot us a fierce glare.
A sharp one, you know.
Who does she think she is… staring at us like that as she walks by.
What’s her problem… glaring at us with that annoyed face… like she’s giving us the finger.
And what’s Jino doing trailing after her like that.
Actively avoiding us like that, no less.
Is she someone he knows…? I never heard anything about that. I’ve never even seen her before.
The only one I know is Junyong…